Moral and Spiritual Growth and Development
HOW FAR ARE YOU ON THE ROAD TO SPIRITUAL MATURITY?
Only you know for sure.
The stages of physical development in the human person are fairly predictable, in a sequence that varies little, with some differences between the sexes. Science does not fully understand intellectual development, but there have been great advances in knowledge of brain function in recent years. Social-emotional development has been explored rather fully, with groundbreaking theories by Piaget, expanded by Erik Erikson and Carol Jung, who all leave room for the action of free will.
The interaction of heredity and environment have provided fodder for plenty of discussion and scientific observation. The third element of “free will” is often left totally out of the picture, yet that is the area where we find a sense of personal responsibility for our thoughts, words and deeds in life. “Sin” is not the result of accident or inherited qualities and predilections. The element of choice must be present for moral behavior to occur, generally not until the mental age of seven. There is no fixed timeline for personal moral or spiritual growth.
AMORAL. DEVELOP SENSE OF TRUST AND AUTONOMY.
RESPONDS TO REWARDS AND FEAR OF PUNISHMENTS.
Preschool age: The very young child, until the age of four or so, is amoral and does not really have a moral conscience. Care-giver influence is very strong. The role of the parent is to provide a healthy nurturing environment, including the child in family and other social events, developing the child’s sense of trust and personal autonomy. The Care givers may provide the child with a unified perspective on life (such as the Christian or Muslim, etc) evidenced in church sponsored events, stories and celebrations throughout the year. Formal instruction is not appropriate, but the adults can expect to be queried about what is “real” or “true.” Children will be “good” or “bad” depending on the immediate reward or punishment they expect. There are persons who remain at this amoral level throughout their lives.
From Jesus: God is Love, and loves all.
LAW OF THE GROUP. DEVELOP SENSE OF ACCEPTANCE, INTIATIVE AND INDUSTRY. RESPONDS TO REWARDS AND PUNISHMENTS AND ATTITUDE OF OTHERS INCLUDING SELF-CRITICISM.
Children of school age: Between the ages of four and eleven approximately, the child will identify with various adults and imitate them, in their own interpretation of that model. The child needs and wants some black and white rules to follow, but cannot tell the difference between good manners and moral imperatives. During this time the child is increasingly sensitive to the attitudes and remarks of others. They believe what they are told is true, even though it may not be so, finding it hard to allow any grey areas. Statements like “You are a bad child” can have devastating long term effects if internalized. The child wants to be loved, and needs to hear that God (however you define that concept) loves him/her unconditionally. Formal instruction is in the concrete realm: how to participate and behave in church and at other solemn occasions, as well as informative study of scriptures. As they mature, children want to be accepted by others besides their family, especially peers, so that the influence of peers increases greatly by the age of eleven. There are persons who remain at this level throughout their lives, constantly sensitive to the judgements of others, who believe “good” and “bad” is black and white and decided once and for all.
From Jesus: Obey the Spirit of the Law.
LAW OF SELF. DEVELOPING SENSE OF INDIVIDUAL IDENTITY.
RESPONDS TO REWARDS AND PUNSIHMENTS, BUT MORE TO OWN SENSE OF RIGHT AND WRONG.
Teens: During the teen years there is increasing desire for independence, for freedom from rules, as the young adult searches for his/her own identity. Consequently these young people challenge authority in all forms: parents, schools, churches, history, and culture. All are questioned and found wanting. Since none are perfect, they can all be justly criticized. There is a very strong sense of right and wrong, but confusion when applying it to personal life through peer pressure, with a desire to excuse oneself from responsibility. There is at the same time a heightened need for intimacy, so there is also a great emphasis on friendships and romance. Formal religious instruction may come in lecture format, but a series of personal encounters with admirable people through social activism, with periods of reflection within a like minded group are also avenues of personal growth. There are persons who remain at this level for most of their lives, a law unto themselves, the final judger of “good” and “bad”.
From Jesus: Love God above all, and your neighbor as yourself. Do not judge. God will forgive you as you forgive others.
LAWS OF COMMUNITY. DEVELOPING SENSE OF CREATIVITY AND GENERATIVITY. RESPONDS TO REWARDS AND PUNISHMENTS, TO OWN SENSE OF RIGHT AND WRONG AND FOLLOWS RULES OF SOCIETY.
Young Adults: Participation in community life will bring the young person to a less judgemental stage, as each uses his/her own gifts and talents to make a living, establish a family, and contribute to society as a whole. In terms of formal religion, they may return to church membership. As good citizens they will obey the laws of the land, recognizing how they participate in the moral aspects of society through their deeds or lack of. Formal religious study may deepen within the Christian faith, or expand to other faiths. There are persons who define “right” as “whatever is legal”, recognizing no other imperatives.
From Jesus: Love One Another as I Have Loved You.
UNIVERSAL LAW S. DEVELOPING SENSE OF INTEGRITY. RESPONDS TO INTERNAL SELF JUDGEMENTS, MAY VIOLATE COMMUNITY LAWS WHICH ARE UNJUST TO PROMOTE CHANGE AND WILLINGLY ENDURE THE PUSHISHMENT AS A CONSEQUENCE.
Mature Adults: With continued intellectual searching, many adults arrive at the conclusion that there is one “God” with many names and many approaches, embodied in other cultures as well as their own culture. There is a heightened sense of the sacred everywhere. They may enjoy liturgies, both formal and informal, may study doctrine in depth, or be attracted to the practices of mysticism as they seek a truly personal experience of “God”. There is an effort to align all aspects of life, to accurately reflect their sense of personal identity, perhaps changing jobs or church affiliation or pursuit of other activities which are more personally rewarding. They may return to active church involvement with new understandings of its fundamental meanings, even though remaining critical of some aspects of church practices. There are many paths. (See Personality and Spiritual Orientation.)
Moral and spiritual “maturity” is an ability to choose an appropriate perspective on one’s behaviors, attitudes and actions. The infant is totally self centered. The growing child recognizes the needs and wants of others, but may choose his/her own over the good of others, regardless of the consequences. The mature adult recognizes a variety of perspectives and strives to balance the good of all against personal choice. Interwoven with each level are periods of confusion, as perspective broadens. Only “God” has the perspective of all simultaneously.
From Jesus: Model of a man of spirit and faith and healing, truthful at the cost of his life, who accepted everyone, especially the outcasts.
Why do people do “bad” things? In brief: They make mistakes. They seek attention. Sometimes they want revenge or power. Sometimes they are truly disabled in terms of morality by abuse or drugs or physical shortcomings. But 85% of the population behaves appropriately for their age and ability all the time. You probably are one of them.
So, where are you in terms of moral and spiritual growth and development?
What perspective do you choose most often? Your own desires and wants? What your family or friends will approve of? The needs of your social group? The good of all people? Can you move easily among perspectives or not? Confusion is a sign of a growth period.
What should you do to grow spiritually?
Here are some suggestions:
• Read about the faith lives of others.
• Follow your own intuitions for activities.
• Learn to meditate.
• Travel and observe non-judgementally.
• Do service projects (good deeds) in some way that suits you.
• Keep a Spirit journal.
• Adorn your home with symbols or pictures that remind you of your spiritual life.
• Pray every day for yourself and all others.
• Attend a church or synagogue or mosque faithfully.
• Attend retreats or lectures.
• Implement resolves that are fitting for you and your circumstances.
• Go about your daily life more mindfully. It’s all there right in front of you.
Only you know for sure.
The stages of physical development in the human person are fairly predictable, in a sequence that varies little, with some differences between the sexes. Science does not fully understand intellectual development, but there have been great advances in knowledge of brain function in recent years. Social-emotional development has been explored rather fully, with groundbreaking theories by Piaget, expanded by Erik Erikson and Carol Jung, who all leave room for the action of free will.
The interaction of heredity and environment have provided fodder for plenty of discussion and scientific observation. The third element of “free will” is often left totally out of the picture, yet that is the area where we find a sense of personal responsibility for our thoughts, words and deeds in life. “Sin” is not the result of accident or inherited qualities and predilections. The element of choice must be present for moral behavior to occur, generally not until the mental age of seven. There is no fixed timeline for personal moral or spiritual growth.
AMORAL. DEVELOP SENSE OF TRUST AND AUTONOMY.
RESPONDS TO REWARDS AND FEAR OF PUNISHMENTS.
Preschool age: The very young child, until the age of four or so, is amoral and does not really have a moral conscience. Care-giver influence is very strong. The role of the parent is to provide a healthy nurturing environment, including the child in family and other social events, developing the child’s sense of trust and personal autonomy. The Care givers may provide the child with a unified perspective on life (such as the Christian or Muslim, etc) evidenced in church sponsored events, stories and celebrations throughout the year. Formal instruction is not appropriate, but the adults can expect to be queried about what is “real” or “true.” Children will be “good” or “bad” depending on the immediate reward or punishment they expect. There are persons who remain at this amoral level throughout their lives.
From Jesus: God is Love, and loves all.
LAW OF THE GROUP. DEVELOP SENSE OF ACCEPTANCE, INTIATIVE AND INDUSTRY. RESPONDS TO REWARDS AND PUNISHMENTS AND ATTITUDE OF OTHERS INCLUDING SELF-CRITICISM.
Children of school age: Between the ages of four and eleven approximately, the child will identify with various adults and imitate them, in their own interpretation of that model. The child needs and wants some black and white rules to follow, but cannot tell the difference between good manners and moral imperatives. During this time the child is increasingly sensitive to the attitudes and remarks of others. They believe what they are told is true, even though it may not be so, finding it hard to allow any grey areas. Statements like “You are a bad child” can have devastating long term effects if internalized. The child wants to be loved, and needs to hear that God (however you define that concept) loves him/her unconditionally. Formal instruction is in the concrete realm: how to participate and behave in church and at other solemn occasions, as well as informative study of scriptures. As they mature, children want to be accepted by others besides their family, especially peers, so that the influence of peers increases greatly by the age of eleven. There are persons who remain at this level throughout their lives, constantly sensitive to the judgements of others, who believe “good” and “bad” is black and white and decided once and for all.
From Jesus: Obey the Spirit of the Law.
LAW OF SELF. DEVELOPING SENSE OF INDIVIDUAL IDENTITY.
RESPONDS TO REWARDS AND PUNSIHMENTS, BUT MORE TO OWN SENSE OF RIGHT AND WRONG.
Teens: During the teen years there is increasing desire for independence, for freedom from rules, as the young adult searches for his/her own identity. Consequently these young people challenge authority in all forms: parents, schools, churches, history, and culture. All are questioned and found wanting. Since none are perfect, they can all be justly criticized. There is a very strong sense of right and wrong, but confusion when applying it to personal life through peer pressure, with a desire to excuse oneself from responsibility. There is at the same time a heightened need for intimacy, so there is also a great emphasis on friendships and romance. Formal religious instruction may come in lecture format, but a series of personal encounters with admirable people through social activism, with periods of reflection within a like minded group are also avenues of personal growth. There are persons who remain at this level for most of their lives, a law unto themselves, the final judger of “good” and “bad”.
From Jesus: Love God above all, and your neighbor as yourself. Do not judge. God will forgive you as you forgive others.
LAWS OF COMMUNITY. DEVELOPING SENSE OF CREATIVITY AND GENERATIVITY. RESPONDS TO REWARDS AND PUNISHMENTS, TO OWN SENSE OF RIGHT AND WRONG AND FOLLOWS RULES OF SOCIETY.
Young Adults: Participation in community life will bring the young person to a less judgemental stage, as each uses his/her own gifts and talents to make a living, establish a family, and contribute to society as a whole. In terms of formal religion, they may return to church membership. As good citizens they will obey the laws of the land, recognizing how they participate in the moral aspects of society through their deeds or lack of. Formal religious study may deepen within the Christian faith, or expand to other faiths. There are persons who define “right” as “whatever is legal”, recognizing no other imperatives.
From Jesus: Love One Another as I Have Loved You.
UNIVERSAL LAW S. DEVELOPING SENSE OF INTEGRITY. RESPONDS TO INTERNAL SELF JUDGEMENTS, MAY VIOLATE COMMUNITY LAWS WHICH ARE UNJUST TO PROMOTE CHANGE AND WILLINGLY ENDURE THE PUSHISHMENT AS A CONSEQUENCE.
Mature Adults: With continued intellectual searching, many adults arrive at the conclusion that there is one “God” with many names and many approaches, embodied in other cultures as well as their own culture. There is a heightened sense of the sacred everywhere. They may enjoy liturgies, both formal and informal, may study doctrine in depth, or be attracted to the practices of mysticism as they seek a truly personal experience of “God”. There is an effort to align all aspects of life, to accurately reflect their sense of personal identity, perhaps changing jobs or church affiliation or pursuit of other activities which are more personally rewarding. They may return to active church involvement with new understandings of its fundamental meanings, even though remaining critical of some aspects of church practices. There are many paths. (See Personality and Spiritual Orientation.)
Moral and spiritual “maturity” is an ability to choose an appropriate perspective on one’s behaviors, attitudes and actions. The infant is totally self centered. The growing child recognizes the needs and wants of others, but may choose his/her own over the good of others, regardless of the consequences. The mature adult recognizes a variety of perspectives and strives to balance the good of all against personal choice. Interwoven with each level are periods of confusion, as perspective broadens. Only “God” has the perspective of all simultaneously.
From Jesus: Model of a man of spirit and faith and healing, truthful at the cost of his life, who accepted everyone, especially the outcasts.
Why do people do “bad” things? In brief: They make mistakes. They seek attention. Sometimes they want revenge or power. Sometimes they are truly disabled in terms of morality by abuse or drugs or physical shortcomings. But 85% of the population behaves appropriately for their age and ability all the time. You probably are one of them.
So, where are you in terms of moral and spiritual growth and development?
What perspective do you choose most often? Your own desires and wants? What your family or friends will approve of? The needs of your social group? The good of all people? Can you move easily among perspectives or not? Confusion is a sign of a growth period.
What should you do to grow spiritually?
Here are some suggestions:
• Read about the faith lives of others.
• Follow your own intuitions for activities.
• Learn to meditate.
• Travel and observe non-judgementally.
• Do service projects (good deeds) in some way that suits you.
• Keep a Spirit journal.
• Adorn your home with symbols or pictures that remind you of your spiritual life.
• Pray every day for yourself and all others.
• Attend a church or synagogue or mosque faithfully.
• Attend retreats or lectures.
• Implement resolves that are fitting for you and your circumstances.
• Go about your daily life more mindfully. It’s all there right in front of you.
posted by MJS at 6:50 PM
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